One Month

We left America 1 month ago (32 days to be exact....but whose counting besides me?). This has been a big day on our "countdown" to coming home. Pa and I both have felt that when we got to this day, we would be over the hump. So we have been looking forward to September 10th, which also happens to be my mother-in-law's birthday - Happy Birthday Grandma Miller! (Ted...that's a subtle hint to make sure you call your mom! Just joking).

Valera And Vladik had a great time yesterday. Valera and I met the Warner's and Vladik at McDonalds for lunch, before we played a bunch of soccer. Valera and I collided at one point during our parents vs. kids game.

I am now a firm believer in the shin guard.

We walked to their apartment where the boys watched some of a movie, ate fruit, then we walked back to a park where the boys played. They met some other kids and started up a soccer game all together. They could have kept going but it was getting late and chilly.

I was so tired last night that I didn't even blog. Both Valera and I slept until 12:30 today. My dad was probably beginning to wonder if we were breathing!

Today, we did more of the same. Pa, Valera and I walked to the university soccer field. A gym class was going on so we decided to play off to the side again. We all took turns wearing the goalie gloves. The gloves are getting dirty and the ball a little "worn". While I was in goal today, Valera kicked a hard shot that I deflected with my left inner thigh.

I am now a firm believer in the thigh guard.

We came home from playing soccer and decided to play UNO. My dad had not yet joined in on the UNO action, and I decided that for our 1 month Anniversary of being in Ukraine, it was time to "let" him in on the fun. We kept tallies again. Pa won five, Valera won five, and I won one game.

During our UNO session, Valera got out dry cereal...little balls of vanilla and chocolate cereal. I had the bright idea of teaching Valera to throw a ball up into the air and to catch it with his mouth. By his success level, we don't think this was his experience. We started tossing the cereal balls up into the air for the others to catch. Valera thought this was hysterical. Cereal balls were all over the kitchen floor. Probably not the best thing to teach him....but on day 32, some things are worth the entertainment.

Tonight we went ice skating with Anya and Den. Valera barely gave me enough time to lace up his skates...he doesn't want to miss a second of the action. I decided to skate again. I am so glad I did...because a most wonderful thing happened:

Let me tell you first that when Valera skates....he is focused on a mission....to be the fastest skater out there. He doesn't make eye contact, smile for pictures, exchange pleasantries, etc. He wants to be the first one on the ice, and the last one off.

Let me also tell you that Valera does not show me much affection (I am ok with that...I know this is a process). When we go to hug at night, he just leans his head into me.  Sometimes when he is laying on the bed watching Tom and Jerry, I lay down next to him. He will slide away a little bit, if not leave the room entirely. With time, he has started letting his guard down ever so slightly.  During an UNO game recently, when tensions were getting high, he and I got nose to nose in a silly way as if to say, "ugghhh...I am taking you down". That was a big step.

So, tonight, Valera was skating past me as usual. I had been having a hard day - missing home, feeling scared about the future, etc. I tried to use this ice skating session to take a break from thinking about everything. I tried to just be in the moment. I enjoyed seeing him and another boy chase each other. I enjoyed watching him smile even when he was laying flat on the ice.

But I mostly enjoyed the feeling of Valera's hand on my back, just for 5 seconds, as he skated by me. An  intentional touch initiated by Valera.  While I need to guard my body parts from Valera's soccer tricks, I know that he needs to guard his heart, the way he has had to all these years. I am just so thankful for the small glimpses when I see him letting me in, even for just a moment.